glorious saturday lazy sundayJune 23, 2008
I was up reasonably early on Saturday with a need to go shopping. My trainers have been wrecked since the visit to Alton Towers and got wet all the way through. I also needed a new dress or two for parties that are coming up. I decided to hit the town with Money that Scotty gave me towards the honeymoon. So I bought two dresses and a pair of trainers and walked for MILES around town. Then I was slightly late for my dress fitting appointment which went really well. I was pinned in to a corset shape built out of strong dress makers fabric for making patterns. We chatted about the design, it was very enjoyable and left me very happy about the dress and although its still in early stages, the progress is still good.
I got home and had to get a shower and doll myself up for the evening. Scotty and I went to a wedding reception for a good friend at work. It was a lovely doo, with fish and chips for everyone and a chocolate fountain on the go too. It was nice to see some colleagues and their other halves, so that they can be invited to our party too.
We got home reasonably early but stayed up way too late… Sunday I woke up and after standing in heels all evening, standing to have my dress fitting and walking all morning I felt quite seized up. I very happily had a quick trip to the shops for food and spent the rest of the day relaxing. I chatted with my sister and brother an Mum too. This is where it hurts. Mum is not well, she has canceled the last step of her chemo because its is not working. Mum said that she wanted to be as fit as she could be for my wedding, for her little girl. It is taking it out of her and not achieving the results we need. This has near broken my heart because I have not seen her in too long. I need to be closer to her as time is slipping and we are very unsure as to what is going on and what we can expect for her time left. The worst thing was listening to her breathless on the phone because the cancer is in her lungs. Watching or even hearing someone you care about so much suffering is probably the most painful bit of the situation. She is surviving for me, for our family and hopefully there will be something else out there we can do but for now its recovery until the wedding so that she can have a good time too. I feel for Dad in this situation too, he has to be there and look after her and watch it all happen. I don’t know what else to say, or do, apart from I do know I need to see her soon and give as much time as I can to being there, sharing and enjoying her company.